Tai Kamiya's Diary
by Takato Lover16
Summary: Tai Kamiya is always lonely, and whenever he does fall in love, his heart gets broken. He tries to find love, while keeping a diary of all the events that happen.
1. Loneliness

This is my first Tai fic, but recently I've been so into him, that I couldn't resist.

This is probably a fic that you either love, or you either hate, but I hope you all love it.

Tai is also gay in this fic, so sorry if I didn't mention it earlier. But you all know now.

Please, R&R.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Tai Kamiya's Diary: Chapter 1- Loneliness

It all began, on my fourteenth birthday;

My mother had made one of her 'special' birthday cakes, and, as usual, my living room was full of my relatives, half of which I couldn't name. My sister, Kari, was quietly eating quite the variation of party food. Despite her small size, she could often rival me, in a 'who can eat the most food' competition. "Tai, stop daydreaming, and come here" I heard a familiar voice, snapping me out of my thoughts.

Following my best friend's voice, I made my way through crowds of relatives, earning the occasional, "Oh, hasn't he grown?" much to my own embarrassment. Finally reaching Sora's side, I relaxed, after sighing exasperatedly from finally escaping the clutches of my grandma. My best friend simply grinned, she wasn't at all surprised by my relatives' behaviour, she was far too used to it for that. I grinned back, trying to hide my red cheeks, but not being very successful.

"Matt's here, you know?" Sora started, she was always trying to get me a boyfriend. Yeah, that's right, boyfriend. When I realised, Sora was the only person that I could confine in, and she is still the only person who knows. "Matt? Who's he" I mused, trying to remember any memory of the so called, Matt. "Well, you don't know him, but I know you'll make the cutest couple" I opened my mouth to say something, when Sora cut in. "Let me introduce you"

Sora grabbed my arm tightly, and lead me to the other side of the room. "Mark, Mark, Mark!" My best friend called, adding even more red to my obviously flushed cheeks. Either that, or it had suddenly got way hotter in here. Instantly, I found myself just inches away from Matt, his back was to me and he showed no signs of moving. "Matt, I want you to meet my best friend, Tai" I heard him sigh, and he slowly turned; his hair reflected the light perfectly, it was a perfect blonde colour.

Maybe this guy wasn't so bad, he did look kinda' cute. But then, I saw something which immediately sent a chill down my spine, his eyes; his eyes were a deep blue, they looked like they were filled with anger, about to explode. And his face; though it looked quite angelic in the light, his frown said the opposite. Though I was a complete stranger to him, he looked at me like an ancient rival. "Oh, I just remembered, I need to help your mum with the food, Tai" Sora started to walk away, is that the best she could come up with?

If that lie was as transparent as I thought it was, Matt knew too, which only made the situation all the more awkward for me. I didn't know what to say, he just focused on anything other than me. I knew that he wouldn't be interested in me, why did I let Sora drag me all this way? This is the way it always happens; she drags me along to some boy, saying that they're going to like me, but it often ends in silence. "Perhaps, we should, eat" Matt spoke, I looked from the floor, to see his cold eyes once more, but he had already walked away.

"Happy birthday dear, Tai, Happy birthday to you" The room chanted in unison, I begged everyone not to sing to me. I guess somewhere inside, though, I really loved it, just as much as when I was a little kid. I made my wish as I inhaled deeply. Letting the air escape my mouth, I blew all of the candles out, leaving smoke and darkness where they once were.

After the cake was cut, and it became late, people started leaving. Kari had fallen asleep on the couch, clutching one of her many stuffed toys, tightly. "Tai, could you please take your sister to bed" My mum called from the kitchen. Recently, I've lost count of how many times I've had carry Kari to bed, but I didn't mind. Once I had picked up her sleeping figure, she held one of her arms instinctively around my neck; she must be so used to it by now. I somehow opened our bedroom door, and placed her gently on the bottom bunk. "Tai...I'm sorry I couldn't stay awake tonight, for your birthday. I went to bed super early yesterday, just to stay awake tonight, but I guess it didn't work." I gasped. I hadn't even realised, without thinking, I quickly hugged her half sleeping figure, and placed the warm covers over her.

"It's okay Kari, good night" "Night, tai. I love you" I get really embarrassed, when anybody mentions the, 'l' word; I guess it's just because I can't express my feelings very well. But for Kari, I always make an exception. "I love you too, Kari" After making sure that she was asleep, I reached for the door handle, but stopped when I heard voices. "Come on, Matt. He's just shy, give it time" "Sora, I do not need a relationship right now. Especially not with some immature boy, who eats like a pig, doesn't talk and looks like a girl.

That was it. That was it. I suddenly realised that unless something changed in my life, I'd be alone forever. I never did let anyone close to me, besides Kari and Sora. I need to take control of my life, I need to make sure that next year, I won't end up lonely again. I'm not crazy, I know that It'll probably never happen, but if I'm sad; my mum always tells me that the feeling won't last that long, and it never does. I just need to stop letting love pass me by. I'm just so fed up of being so lonely.

I need to take control of my life.

I need to write a diary.

Sorry if it was really short.

It's just the prologue, anyway.

But, please, R)

:D

XD


	2. Writing The Truth

I am really enjoying writing this story, I know that Tai will seem very, very, very, very, very, OC, but that's deliberate. I just think he's really cute, and this is the way I see him, really.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything

Please, R&R

Tai Kamiya's Diary: Chapter 2- Writing The Truth

January 9th 2009

Why can't I ever find a boyfriend? Well, even a boy who's my friend would be a lot better than what I'm normally used to. I do really try to be polite and nice to everyone I meet, they just never seem to notice. I guess I'm just not good enough for anybody. I'll probably regret writing this in the morning, because in the middle of the night, I often find myself thinking a lot, about my life. I've never ever had a boyfriend; I've not even held hands with a boy before.

I know I want to, but if a boy ever comes close to me, I ruin it for myself. Sometimes it annoys me that Sora jokes around, trying to find me the perfect boyfriend, I usually end up humiliated, with my feelings deeply hurt. Anyway, I'm going to the park tomorrow afternoon, where it's quiet, so I'll probably write more in my diary then.

Tai Kamiya was sat with his legs crossed, on the top bunk, in his and Kari's shared bedroom. Though the curtains were shut, most probably by their mother, the strong moonlight still managed to infiltrate the room, silently. An uncomfortable feeling emerged just below Tai's navel; he placed the diary down calmly, and made his way to the family bathroom.

Upon entering the chilly bathroom, the brunette shivered, and he wrapped his arms around his fragile body. After Tai had pulled the chain, much to the aggravation of the other people in the house, he looked at himself in the mirror. His bare feet were small and timid, his slender, yet short legs carried on, up to his girl-like waist. In-fact, his whole body could be considered feminine; Tai's shoulders were meek, and his arms were just as slender as his legs.

The brunette pouted toward his reflection, his lips were lithe, and his face was just about the same shape as his mothers. Big, Chocolate brown eyes looked innocently at each other; they seemed to never blink, not once. A sad sigh escaping his lips, Tai walked back into his shared bedroom, scratching his irritated, tiny nose. Wearing only his tight underwear, it's no surprise that Tai Kamiya was cold. He opened a nearby drawer, and pulled out a long sleeved shirt.

The brunette's chest felt relieved, as the soft fabric of the shirt touched it. Once again, Tai wrapped his arms around his body, trying to get as warm as possible. Small ears prick up, as Tai hears a faint meowing sound, coming from the kitchen. As usual, letting his curiosity get the better of him, the sleepy boy entered the kitchen, and what he saw made his already big eyes widen.

Miko, his cat, was lying on the kitchen floor, with broken glass surrounding him. Tai warily edged closer to his cat, making sure not to cut himself on the sharp shards of glass. The brunette gently wrapped his arms around Miko, and carried him to the bathroom. The young Kamiya looked closely at the cat's paw; there were drops of blood slowly and painfully emitting from the visible wound. Tai wasn't quite sure how to care for your cat, when he has cut his paw, but he instinctively picked up the first aid box, which was lying next to his small feet.

"You're going to be okay, Miko" The brunette wasn't even sure if his cat could understand him, but the gentle purr, and warm touch answered that question for him. Tai thoroughly washed Miko's paw, and wrapped it in one of the many bandages. The cat let out a gentle meow, to thank the brunette, before trying to casually walk out of the bathroom. "Oh no, you don't. I'm not letting you out of my sight again, tonight" Tai spoke, exactly how his mother would have done to him, the thought made him smile slightly.

After the feminine-looking boy had finished sweeping up the broken glass, and turned all of the lights off in the house, it was finally time for bed. Tai gently rubbed his chocolate brown eyes, and was once again, sitting cross-legged on the top of the bunk bed. But this time, Miko was snuggled comfortably in his lap. Tai slowly reached over to his open diary, shut it, and put it back in his extra special secret hiding place, or, under his pillow.

Once it was stuffed under securely enough, the proud young boy placed the freshly sharpened pencil behind his ear. Suddenly feeling quite frustrated that he had to disturb Miko's obviously cosy position, Tai picked the cat up, climbed under his sheets, and lay Miko next to him. The brunette's bare-feet were still freezing, although they were now under the bed sheets. Tai tried to contemplate a solution, but doing so only made him more tired.

Finally coming to the conclusion that, they'll either warm up anyway, or the fact that when you're asleep, you can't feel the cold, reassured Tai's sleepiness. Miko's slowing heartbeat indicated that the feline had already dropped into the world of slumber, and Tai Kamiya wasn't long after that.

That's the end of chapter 2.

I'm sorry that this was actually shorter than the first, but please bear with it; if they're small chapters, I'll just have to make lots of them.

Please, R)

:D

XD


End file.
